Friday Snippet: Pirouette Rewrite

Here’s today’s offering.  Kind of sad.

Warning: explicit language and raw rough draftage.

Sleep was a dreamless thing, as elusive as a shadow, as unreachable as the moon.  I floated in liquid darkness, tossed about like a wave caught in the sea, looking for light and not finding it.


The dream that found me lit up the landscape of the Varshella: my fog-world.


The vaguely Faerie form glowed from within.  Its wings stretched out to double its arm-span.  They, strangely enough, bore the sidhe royal wing markings.


That’s when a shiver passed through me; when my internal alarms shrieked for me to pause, take it all in.




She – I could tell now from the long white gown she wore – floated towards me.  Her eyes – eyes that looked suspiciously like mine, except they were darker, almost a jade green – met mine, and she shrieked at my mind.


Naturally, it scared the crap out of me.


My heart pounded; my palms were wet.  My mind was telling me to run, but my heart had other ideas.


I moved forward slowly, holding my hands up to show that I meant no harm. 


As she came closer, I noticed that she was, actually, new dead.  A halfling.  She was more solid than most halflings, which puzzled me. 


What my brain put together slammed into me with all the elegance of a two-ton weight.  To the head.


She was one of my own.


I couldn’t do the Death Dance here, so I had to warm up to the idea of not shielding.  Not a smart move, as this sidhe-royal could be a demon or dark entity in disguise.  It could be anything. 


I should just leave, I thought, watching as the sidhe-royal floated almost close enough to touch.


But that wasn’t the way things would play out now, would they?  Honestly – I can be a real dumb ass.  I took risks on a daily basis, risks that could very well get me killed.  Why?  Usually, it’s in the name of helping the dead.  Usually.


So why couldn’t I bring myself to leave?  Leaving was simple.  Well, the act was.  Doing it was another thing altogether.


Get it together, Alisia.  She’s too close—


Alisia?  I’d know her voice any damn where.  Grandma!


She reached out to touch me, leaving a cold draft in her wake.  She grasped my hand, and it felt like holding ice cubes.  She was certainly not the normal case.  Halflings couldn’t touch anyone or anything without passing through.  It just never happened.  Until now.


 I opened my mouth to speak, then promptly closed it.  Grandma?  That you?


Grandma nodded in her regal way.  Something has happened to me, childe.  I was captured and then – Her face blanked out, smoothed down like a piece of parchment.  Her eyes deadened; the life extinguished.  My heart ached for her.


 I squeezed her frigid hand.  Grandma?


She blinked at me.  Where am I?  Who are you?


2 thoughts on “Friday Snippet: Pirouette Rewrite

  1. That IS sad. Poor Grandma. But it made me want to read more, and I can’t wait! Congrats on getting so far in your PR. I know you’re further now, and I couldn’t be more proud of you. 🙂

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